Princess Qonzilqointec In Moscow
The Aztec vampire princess Qonzilqointec was in Moscow for a meeting with Russian President Vladimir Putin.
"Your spiritual father Quetzalcoatl was here in Moscow on Christmas Day for the unveiling of Set Laboratories Moscow's latest genetic creation," Putin smiled at the Aztec vampire princesss.
Qonzilqointec smoothed her rusty brown pleated skirt and adjusted her ruby red silk pantyhose before replying, "I understand this new genetic being you've dubbed the Czarevich."
"That's true," Putin nodded, "I did it because of who his mentor will be- the monk Rasputin who's been a vampire all these years ever since his supposed death on the night of December 16th-17th, 1916."
"My father informed me that Rasputin was still alive and was a vampire," Princess Qonzilqointec crossed her legs, "that I did not know."
"He was turned into a vampire by the Transylvanian Count Vladimir Nosferatu who I believe you know," Putin smiled, "Count Vladimir was in the pay of the German Kaiser during the First World War and the Kaiser thought having Rasputin still alive (though technically vampirically undead) and kicking would help undermine Russia's war effort."
(Note to readers: Count Vladimir Nosferatu is not to be confused with Count Dracula or Prince Vlad III Tepes (Vlad the Impaler) who was slain by Doctor Abraham Van Helsing the great-great-great grandfather of the noted contemporary vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing. Count Nosferatu is a minor Transylvanian nobleman who has leased out his ancestral home Castle Nosferatum and is currently living in New York City)
"But he really didn't do much did he, Rasputin... as a vampire I mean," Qonzilqointec smiled, "it was Lenin who helped Germany's war efforts on the Eastern front by pulling Russia out of the war."
"No, becoming a vampire sent Rasputin into a state of shock," Putin smiled, "he returned to his hometown of Pokrovskoye in Siberia where he lived in undead obscurity until the Soviet Union was formally dissolved by Gorbachev back on Christmas Day, 1991. Then he returned to Saint Petersburg where he found a job working in the Mayor's office as a nighttime filing clerk. He later joined the FSB in 1997. He's done a bunch of personal work for me ever since."
"I understand Rasputin had to be brought back from the dead again," Qonzilqointec uncrossed her legs.
"Yes," said President Putin who was starting to get a huge erection as a result of Qonzilqointec constantly crossing and uncrossing her legs, "an anti-Communist vampiress the Countess Tatiana (who was a distant cousin of Czar Nicholas II during her mortal life) cut off Rasputin's head. She found out that Rasputin had been setting fire to various hospitals and clinics across Russia the past couple of months."
"I understand Rasputin did that as a form of occultic ritual sacrifice to release the ancient Canaanite god Moloch from his place of captivity in the northern Russian city of Arkhangelsk," Qonzilqointec put one of her brown stiletto high-heeled shoed nyloned feet up on Putin's desk.
"I'm going to have to use a hammer to hammer this down," Putin thought to himself and then aloud he said, "yes as a part of a deal my Administration made with your spiritual father Quetzalcoatl. Your father very much longed for Moloch's help."
"I understand it was Moloch who brought Rasputin's head and body back to Moscow after the Countess Tatiana had beheaded him," Qonzilqointec flashed Putin a wide smile (and flashed more than that).
"Yes," Putin answered who was starting to think of the winter beaver hunt in Russia for some reason, "Moloch brought Rasputin to Moscow where he was once again raised from the dead through the help of the ancient Egyptian vampire Set's genetics laboratories in Moscow." A glimpse of Qonzilqointec is better than western Viagara Comrade Putin thought to himself.
"I would like to see this genetically designed child whom you call the Czarevich," Qonzilqointec stood up on her stiletto high-heels.
Unbeknownst to Russian President Vladimir Putin, Qonzilqointec was with child herself. A child conceived after a night of love-making with the great Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing.
To be continued.
"Your spiritual father Quetzalcoatl was here in Moscow on Christmas Day for the unveiling of Set Laboratories Moscow's latest genetic creation," Putin smiled at the Aztec vampire princesss.
Qonzilqointec smoothed her rusty brown pleated skirt and adjusted her ruby red silk pantyhose before replying, "I understand this new genetic being you've dubbed the Czarevich."
"That's true," Putin nodded, "I did it because of who his mentor will be- the monk Rasputin who's been a vampire all these years ever since his supposed death on the night of December 16th-17th, 1916."
"My father informed me that Rasputin was still alive and was a vampire," Princess Qonzilqointec crossed her legs, "that I did not know."
"He was turned into a vampire by the Transylvanian Count Vladimir Nosferatu who I believe you know," Putin smiled, "Count Vladimir was in the pay of the German Kaiser during the First World War and the Kaiser thought having Rasputin still alive (though technically vampirically undead) and kicking would help undermine Russia's war effort."
(Note to readers: Count Vladimir Nosferatu is not to be confused with Count Dracula or Prince Vlad III Tepes (Vlad the Impaler) who was slain by Doctor Abraham Van Helsing the great-great-great grandfather of the noted contemporary vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing. Count Nosferatu is a minor Transylvanian nobleman who has leased out his ancestral home Castle Nosferatum and is currently living in New York City)
"But he really didn't do much did he, Rasputin... as a vampire I mean," Qonzilqointec smiled, "it was Lenin who helped Germany's war efforts on the Eastern front by pulling Russia out of the war."
"No, becoming a vampire sent Rasputin into a state of shock," Putin smiled, "he returned to his hometown of Pokrovskoye in Siberia where he lived in undead obscurity until the Soviet Union was formally dissolved by Gorbachev back on Christmas Day, 1991. Then he returned to Saint Petersburg where he found a job working in the Mayor's office as a nighttime filing clerk. He later joined the FSB in 1997. He's done a bunch of personal work for me ever since."
"I understand Rasputin had to be brought back from the dead again," Qonzilqointec uncrossed her legs.
"Yes," said President Putin who was starting to get a huge erection as a result of Qonzilqointec constantly crossing and uncrossing her legs, "an anti-Communist vampiress the Countess Tatiana (who was a distant cousin of Czar Nicholas II during her mortal life) cut off Rasputin's head. She found out that Rasputin had been setting fire to various hospitals and clinics across Russia the past couple of months."
"I understand Rasputin did that as a form of occultic ritual sacrifice to release the ancient Canaanite god Moloch from his place of captivity in the northern Russian city of Arkhangelsk," Qonzilqointec put one of her brown stiletto high-heeled shoed nyloned feet up on Putin's desk.
"I'm going to have to use a hammer to hammer this down," Putin thought to himself and then aloud he said, "yes as a part of a deal my Administration made with your spiritual father Quetzalcoatl. Your father very much longed for Moloch's help."
"I understand it was Moloch who brought Rasputin's head and body back to Moscow after the Countess Tatiana had beheaded him," Qonzilqointec flashed Putin a wide smile (and flashed more than that).
"Yes," Putin answered who was starting to think of the winter beaver hunt in Russia for some reason, "Moloch brought Rasputin to Moscow where he was once again raised from the dead through the help of the ancient Egyptian vampire Set's genetics laboratories in Moscow." A glimpse of Qonzilqointec is better than western Viagara Comrade Putin thought to himself.
"I would like to see this genetically designed child whom you call the Czarevich," Qonzilqointec stood up on her stiletto high-heels.
Unbeknownst to Russian President Vladimir Putin, Qonzilqointec was with child herself. A child conceived after a night of love-making with the great Canadian vampire hunter Dracul Van Helsing.
To be continued.
posted by Christopher @ 1:06 PM
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