Warehouse Rock

Announcer: And now, welcome back to the CHAOS-TV Channel 66 News with Jock Borrow and Nicole Oronto...

Nicole: Thanks Chuck. Well Jock (turning to her co-anchor): We're still getting a lot of phone calls about last night's entertainment story, the Crossbow Archery Tournament at The Warehouse Nightclub...

Jock: Yes, it seems to be one of the hottest stories we've done recently... (drops coins on the floor and gets down to pick them up and then tries to look up Nicole's skirt)...

Nicole (stabbing Jock's hand with her spiked stiletto high-heeled shoes): Let's review some of the highlights of that story...

(Image of the Mongolian vampire Ghenghis the Gargantuan appears on the screen)

Ghenghis the Gargantuan: I'm going to win this archery tournament. Nobody can fire a crossbow farther and faster than me...

(Image of the masked heavy metal singer Diablos Nocturna appears on the screen)

Diablos Nocturna: Let the games begin...

(Harry Woo is called to the center of the stage. He is told to turn around and bend over and on the backside of his pants, someone has painted an archery target)

Nicole: And of course the tournament turned out to be a draw between Ghenghis the Gargantuan from Mongolia and Diablos Nocturna the masked heavy metal singer from God knows where.

Jock (in agony on the floor): Which means there will be a second tournament this weekend.

Nicole: So walk on and rock on down to the Warehouse this weekend. Like the song says, "When you're alone and life is making you lonely, you can always go- downtown..."