Renfield And The Little Mermaid

BBC News Announcer: In the news today, Renfield R. Renfield the Chief of Security and Intelligence for the prestigious London-based Set Enterprises was found tied to the rock on which the Little Mermaid sits near the city of Copenhagen. When Renfield was rescued by the Danish coast guard, he was heard to say, "Curse you Amadeus..."

Amadeus snickered as he ate potato chips and French Onion chip dip while watching television in the sitting room of the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set's colossal London home.

Just then there was a knock at the front door.

Still eating from his bag of potato chips, Amadeus went and answered the door.

A man stood there in episcopal robes, "I am His Eminence Rowan Williams the Anglican ArchDruid of Canterbury..."

Amadeus slammed the door.

He went back to the sitting room and continued to watch television.

More knocking at the door.

This time Athelstan who was the billionaire vampire Set's personal valet and butler answered the door.

"I'm ArchDruid Williams," said the exasperated man, "I have an appointment to see Mr. Set."

"This way, sir," Athelstan directed the ArchDruid, "the Master is sitting in the library."

The ArchDruid followed Athelstan into the library.

Minutes later, Amadeus picked up what appeared to be a remote control and pressed a button.

But it was obviously not the TV remote control as the channel continued to be BBC News and showed Renfield being attacked on the Copenhagen beach by real live mermaids.

Suddenly screaming could be heard coming from the library.

It was the voices of both the billionaire ancient Egyptian vampire Set and the Anglican ArchDruid of Canterbury shrieking in sheer terror.

"Great heavens," Athelstan opened the door, "a Crucifix seems to have come down from the ceiling."

Amadeus chuckled as he dipped another potato chip into the chip dip.

To be continued.